A man is flying in a hot air balloon and realizes he is lost.
He reduces height and spots a man down below. He lowers the balloon further
and shouts: "Excuse me, can you tell me where I am?" The man below says: "yes
you're in a hot air balloon, hovering 30 feet above this field." "You must work
in Information Technology," says the balloonist. "I do," replies the man. "How
did you know?" "Well" says the balloonist, "everything you have told me is technically
correct, but it's no use to anyone." The man below says, "You must work in Management".
"I do" replies the balloonist, "but how did you know?" "Well", says the man,
"you don't know where you are, or where you're going, but you expect me to be
able to help. You're in the same position you were before we met, but now it's
my fault."
An American man, a Russian man, and an African man were all up in a hot-air
balloon together. After a few minutes, the Russian man put his hand down through
the clouds. "Aaah!" he said. "We're right over my homeland." "How can you tell?"
asked the American. "I can feel the cold air," he replied. A few hours later
the African man put his hand through the clouds. "Aah we're right over my homeland,"
he said. "How do you know that?" asked the Russian. "I can feel the heat of
the desert." Several more hours later the American put his hand through the
clouds. "Aah, we're right over New York." The Russian and the African were amazed.
"How do you know all of that?!" they exclaimed. The American pulled his hand
up and said, "My watch is missing.
Is a Hot Air Balloon a Male or Female?
Hot Air Balloon is a male, because to
get it to go anywhere you have to light a fire under it... and, of course, there's
the hot air part.
The Americans and the Japanese decided to engage in a competitive balloon race.
Both teams practiced hard and long to reach their peak performance. On the big
day they felt ready. The Japanese won by a mile. Afterwards, the American team
was discouraged by the loss. Morale sagged. Corporate management decided that
the reason for the crushing defeat had to be found, so a consulting firm was
hired to investigate the problem and recommended corrective action. The consultant's
finding: The Japanese team had eight people steering and one person navigating;
the American team had one person steering and eight people navigating. After
a year of study and millions spent analyzing the problem, the consultant firm
concluded that too many people were navigating and not enough were steering
on the American team. So as race day neared again the following year, the American
team's management structure was completely reorganized. The new structure: four
navigation managers, three area navigation managers and a new performance review
system for the person steering the balloon to provide work incentive. The next
year, the Japanese won by two miles. Humiliated, the American corporation laid
off the steerer for poor performance and gave the managers a bonus for discovering
the problem.
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